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Topic: Some Pets are like children

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Jade
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Some Pets are like children
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I am new to this fabulous board.  I thought perhaps some of you might remember a special pet and understand the loss I am feeling right now.

I visited my family a couple of weeks ago in another state.  I've made it a habit of taking my little "Frankie" (a miniature dashaund) with me.  He has always been easy to care for and a lot of fun to share with the family.

Unfortunately, my mother has an equally loved shepherd who apparently got jealous of the attention Frankie was getting.  My grandson (age 6) let him out of the room we were staying in and the Shepherd killed him.  My mother,father, my grandson and myself tried to stop it.  My mom was injured and hospitalized for wounds to her hand. 

My poor little grandson cried for days (on top of it, he was sick with a high fever). My family felt so badly.  Most of all, every time my mom saw me for the remainder of my stay, she burst into tears.  I found myself trying to comfort everyone and hurting like crazy for myself.

I came home to my husband who is feeling devastated as well.  We have a house guest and haven't been able to even talk about the loss of Frankie.  I can't believe the sadness hardly lifts.

I've decided to make a scrapbook of the many pictures of the funny things he did and try to erase the one horrible memory.  Maybe someone feels like sharing about how they recovered from this type of loss?

My thanks!

Jade

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Sallyjo
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Oh Jade!

My heart is with you! My cats are my kids, so I cannot imagine! Just like losing a person we must have to grieve it also. You also lost him so tragically, which I am sure is tough remembering.

I hope you and your husband can talk soon. I have a friend who lost her SO to cancer and she had trouble remembering him healthy..  he didn't even look like himself at the end. At first she had a hard time not remembering him this way, but tried to pull out my good memories and photos.. eventually that is how she remembers him - healthy which is hopeful.

 Making the scrapbook sounds kinda healing for you and I hope it is. I am so glad you found a message board that is willing to talk about grieving our pets too. My pets are my kids and I know many people feel the same way.Glad you posted.

My brother and his wife lost their dog a few years back and it was devastating to them, but they got through it slowly. Don't hurry. I am sorry for your Moms wounds  too. Don't forget about yourself too.

I am so sorry jade!Keep posting!

Sal


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Sallyjo
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PS I keep hanging out here on this board as it 'feels' good. However, I worry it will get like other boards where the negative people troll. I hope not with coaches monitoring.

Hope you stick around too Jade!

Sal

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Jade
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Hi Sal,

I want to thank you so much for the words of encouragement. I do miss my little guy but it helped to come to a place and share that feeling. You are right, it does "feel good" to share here.

I have a feeling that these boards will grow rapidly. I know that some negativity pops it's head into every positive effort but I do plan on staying. I hope that the things I post to people will be taken with the love I will always intend.

Thanks again for your support. And... by the way, how do you get an icon or an avitar for the boards?

Jade

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Sallyjo
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I am so glad you are staying too! It does help to talk when I hurt too.

I found some generic avatars under my profile options. You can upload one too [I think] ... However, there are some pretty nice ones on this board.

Can't wait to see yours!

Sal

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Sallyjo
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Hey Jade,

How are you doing? I have been wondering about you since I read your post.

Thinking of you...

Sal

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Jade
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Thank you so much Sal,
I am doing well. I haven't done anymore with the avitars but I will start looking for one. Thanks for the information.
Lately I have been able to talk and process the loss of the "little guy" with my husband, it's helped a lot. We have 2 other dogs, one is going to be 13 on Valentines Day and the other is about 5. I've been taking them to the dog park and doing some fun things with them. All in all, it's going ok.
I'm glad I got to talk about it here a little bit as well. Your comforting words helped.

Jade

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Jenkski
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Hey Jade,

I wanted to say I am so sorry. How are you doing? I can't imagine because I love my pets too. That is terrible!

I wish I had some comforting words for you.

Marie

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Crazier5
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Jade,

I am so sorry! I lost a dear dog of mine which was hit by a car. It was totally devastating! Hope you are doing ok, I know it does take some time to get better.

Hugs!

Gina

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Jade
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Thank you again to everyone. I thought it would be a long time before I wanted another little dashaund but... the lady that sold me Frankie sent me an e-mail the other day and told me the same mom and dad will be having little puppies in March. I started thinking how lucky I would be to get a brother or a sister of Frankie. Not sure what my husband is going to think of the idea, but I have a hunch he'll like the idea. Somehow I don't think it's minimizing the love I have for Frankie but instead continuing on with the fun and delight that he brought...; What do you think?

Jade

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PammyT
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Dear Jade,

I just read this. Wow, I am so sorry! I think it's very healing to want to bring a sibling of Frankies into yours. Nothing wrong with that at all. I dont' think that minimizes your love at all.

That is hard.  Pets are like children!

Pam

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Sallyjo
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Hey Jade,

Just wondering how you are doing since the loss of the little guy. I think you are lucky to get another puppy that is a sibling. That is wonderful!

Take care,

Sal

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Merna Throne
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Hello Jade,

First, here is a big hug for you and your loss. I am so sorry to hear of this devastating event in your life. Losing a pet is just as emotional as all the other losses in our lives, we must still heal. I am overwhelmed and happy that you have found a great support here on our forums. Human compassion is needed when our hearts are hurting so desperately.

After reading through this thread that has been written over some time, it seems you are healing your heart and considering taking in a new baby. How exciting! It won't replace the loss, but loving a new puppy will help in the healing process of Frankie. You are on a good road of recovery here.

Take good care and I will check up on you soon!

Hugs!



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Merna Throne
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Sallyjo
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Hey Jade,

How are you?

Sal

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PammyT
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Yeah Jade,

How are you doing?

Fill us in!

Pam

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Merna Throne
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Jade,

I love that so many people care about you and care enough to know the latest. I hope you stop by soon and fill us in.

This was a terrible tragedy for you!

Merna

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Merna Throne
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Jade
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Just a quick update for all of you kind people. We are anxiously awaiting the arrival of a new puppy from the same parents as Frankie had. He or she is due any day now and I can hardly wait. This will be the last litter from these two parents so I feel really fortunate to be able to get a sibling of Frankie's. He or she may even have a little painted bottom just like Frankie had.

We wanted a name that would go with Frank. What better name than "Beans"? My grandson is coming down to visit soon. He is still trying to understand what happened to Frankie and just exactly how long "forever" is. He will get to see Beans when he visits although Beans will probably still be too young to bring him home.

It's interesting in a way to see grief at different ages. My grandson is open and honest and so innocent about how he feels. Sometimes when I think of a loss I think it would be so much simpler if we could just say how we feel (as adults) and not worry about trying to cover up your feelings or just get over it.

I am so glad that my grandson will be able to celebrate this new life. It's sad to experience a death (even of a pet) but so wonderful a gift to celebrate a new life!

~Jade

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