End of a relationship

Sallyjo

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Posts: 34

Date: 12:56 PM, 01/20/09

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Hello!

I found this website and thought it seemed kind. My relationship ended about a month ago and I am still reeling from it. Yes, I am very touchy right now, so I thought this board seemed very kind and nice with the professional coaches as the mod's.

K** and I were together for 2 years and I thought things were going very well. We had just moved in together a couple of months before he came home one day and said he changed his mind. I know he didn't want to hurt me, but I was devastated! How could he just change his mind? I don't get it...

I am having real trouble shaking this off and my friends are sick of me. What can I do? I am going to check out that ehelp assignment someone posted.. I need something. I don't even want to get out of bed.

How do I just start over? The last thing I want to do is date right now, but all my friends said that is what the 'cure' is. I just can't agree with this.

I will check back and hopefully find support from you people here.

I know I need something.

Thank you for listening.

Sal

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kari

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Posts: 10

Date: 10:24 AM, 01/21/09

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I seem to have some what of a similar situation, but in reverse. I have been dating a guy for getting close to 2 years and although I enjoy being with him, I just don't love him like I should. As we spend more time together I feel more friendly with him then romantic. He's been begging to move in with me and would love to give me a ring and get married. I just can't do that. Like I said, I do love going out and doing things with him, or sitting at home hanging out. But when I think about us being together all I see is his lack of responsibility and immaturity.

I know this doesn't help you feel better about a broken relationship, but from someone on the side of the breaking...it very possibly has very little to do with you. My boyfriend is certainly not at fault for the downhill slope of our relationship, it does have a lot to do with me and my need for "perfection." So maybe that is something to be realized. He may have not seen you as perfect for him, but it by no means doesn't mean your not a wonderful person, and perfect for someone else out there.

I ran across this quote somewhere and I LOVE it: "One day your prince will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions."

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Sallyjo

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Posts: 34

Date: 3:47 PM, 01/21/09

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Thanks Kari! I actually chuckled at the end of your post. Yes, I am sure it he may not feel the same, but my heart is broken. Of course, I want him to feel the same way. I just keep thinking.. did I do something wrong? Is there something I should have done? Is there someone else?

I know all these are normal feelings, but I still hurt. I may check out more on pocket of pearls ehelp library and let you know how it goes.

I just want to feel better. Thank you for your kinds words. Good luck to you.

Have you told the guy? What do you plan on doing with your relationship?

Sal
aww

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kari

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Date: 11:09 AM, 01/22/09

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Isn't it always easier being the person saying oh its not you its him. I know that you are hurting, and I want to help you. But its also not going to dissapear just like that.

I think we all just need to do something for ourselves in times like this and pamper ourselves as best we can. Don't forget to go out and try to have fun. Get a couple of your close friends together and if you can afford it, go have a spa day together where you get manicures, pedicures and massages. If thats not in your budget, do an at home spa day. Vow not to talk about boys and relationships...unless your watching sappy romantic movies so you can cry your heart out (but remember its a movie, of course the pretty girl is going to get the wonderful man in the end...it doesn't mean your happy ending isn't coming soon).

Hmm, now that I talk about it, a spa day doesn't sound so bad. When are we going?!?! haha

-- Edited by kari at 11:10, 2009-01-22

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Jenkski

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Posts: 14

Date: 8:45 AM, 01/23/09

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Hey both of you! I just wanted to chime in for a sec and say I am sorry for the confusing times you are all going through. I wish I had some magic words for both of you. I have been there too... it does get better. Hang in there! Marie __________________

Sallyjo

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Posts: 34

Date: 2:30 PM, 03/06/09

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Hey Kari, How are you doing with your situation. I think I am feeling better bit by bit. I am up for a spa day... God knows I need it! Sal __________________

Sallyjo

Novice Member

Status: Offline

Posts: 34

Date: 7:43 AM, 05/14/09

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Hey Kari!

I have been MIA for a while taking care of me. I have been checking in here and not posting as I don't have much to say. I have been working on healing my heart through the stuff I bought from this website. Wow! It is really growing.. how cool is this store. I ordered a tee and a blank journal cause i really need it.

Just checking in. I am much better than I was when I originally found this place and will keep checking back now. Looking back I am better than I even say. I guess it takes time to heal and I was completely wiped out with K** leaving me.

Thank you for your support!

Sal

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kari

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Posts: 10

Date: 2:40 PM, 06/04/09

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I have been MIA as well. Things just had gotten crazy in my life, so I put myself to the back burner...but I'm back! I was cleaning last night and found my pocket of pearls workbook, which of course has all my notes and thoughts in it. Wow, I can't believe how long I put myself last for...again! But the trusty website and message bords are still here and as great as ever! And just to remind myself, I ordered a t-shirt so whenever I see it and wear it I will remember to take care of myself.

Just an update, I am still in the same relationship as mentioned before, but things have gotten better. We had a very serious heart to heart (ok, it was more like a major argument or two that eventually turned into a halfway decent talk) but I think we've made some progress.

Glad to hear your doing better!

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Topic: End of a relationship

End of a relationship